Thursday, September 10, 2009

Strawberry Ice Cream Theory




These days I am engaged to a guy that I find fantastic, but I have dated my fair share of disasters. Being a girl, and a neurotic one at that, after each relationship failed there was that "what happened?" period where every move that was ever made was analyzed (don't say you've never done it...I know you have).

So after the relationship before S finally fizzled, I was looking at what the people in my past had in common.

Common Factors of People I Have Dated (and then stopped dating for one reason or another):
- Light colored eyes (I have blue eyes, so I can see past this one)
- Crazy (I would love to say that I dumped people once I found this out, but what can you do? Hindsight is 20/20)
- LIKED STRAWBERRY ICE CREAM

So you are probably saying, "What's so wrong with strawberry ice cream? I enjoy some Neopolitan now and again." What is wrong with strawberry ice cream? EVERYTHING. The fact that I even have to explain it is disconcerting. (And for the record, if I am eating Neopolitan ice cream, I avoid the strawberry)

Now please don't get me wrong. I have nothing against the strawberry itself. I love strawberry flavored things (strawberry on cheesecake, strawberries in my smoothie, chocolate covered strawberries, strawberry yogurt, strawberry margaritas, you get the idea...), but these guys would seek out strawberry. I remember more than once with each of these dudes sought it out.

For example, my last ex before S and I were driving somewhere and I had a hankering for a milkshake. We pull up to the Wendy's drive-thru and he asks what I want (chocolate) and then he orders a STRAWBERRY FROSTIE for himself. Do you know what this is? Blasphemy. (Wendy's is known for their chocolate frosties. This is a fact. I should have known then...)

My college ex and I once went to the grocery store together and do you know what he put in the cart (I am sure at this point in the story you could guess)? STRRAWBERRY ICE CREAM. Not vanilla with strawberry pieces (acceptable), but PINK STRAWBERRY ICE CREAM.

I could go on and on about this topic, but I think you have the point.

Moral of the story: Ladies, if you are dating a guy and he orders strawberry ice cream, run (don't walk) out of the door.



I am serious though. Poll your friends and loved ones. See who would seek out strawberry ice cream. In my experience, the only ones who answer yes to seeking it out are, in fact, crazy.


You're welcome in advance.




Feel free to share your own horror stories in the comments.

22 comments:

rootsandrings said...

I whole-heartedly agree. Never trust someone who prefers strawberry ice cream. Glad we can agree on that.

(Btw, check my blog today. You'll like it :)

Just Add Walter said...

ok... I guess I am a freak because I LOVE strawberry ice cream!!! :) or does that theory only work for boys?

Martinis or Diaper Genies? said...

ok first of all I am PANICKING. I believe B loves strawberry ice cream!
shitshitshitshit

divorce? I should just do it right?

PS
when the Fballs did Wendy's obtain strawberry frostie mix???

Dollface said...

hahahaha... totally running from strawberry ice-cream loving men... youre too funny, xxxooo

landlocked bride said...

I love this post. Sometimes I order a scoop of strawberry and a scoop of dark chocolate together, but never strawberry by itself. Bleh!

Stephanie @ Just Shoe Me said...

Great. Now I have to screen for ice cream preferences as well?

I'm tired.

Sole Matters said...

omg, if I am eating Neopolitan ice cream, I avoid the strawberry too!!! hahahaa do you have any other tips that i should avoid??

Southern Champagne Wishes said...

Hee hee! I love this! I have a thing where I know a guy is not for me if he drives a "weird" car (a list too long to list) or a car that's not really a "guy's" car.

Perfectly Pleasant said...

haha, that's funny because all the guys I dated before The Boyfriend were vanilla fans -- nothing more -- just vanilla, who is that plain?! The Boyfriend likes strawberry and I'm okay with that except when we order they always give me the gross strawberry and give him my lovely chocolate.

Kassie said...

haha, too true!! Honestly, who goes to Wendys to get strawberry?! What was he thinking.

Elizabeth Marie said...

Strawberry at Wendys? I didn't even know they had that. That's annoying.

OMG now I'm trying to piece together what whackness all my ex's have in common...talk about post inspiration. :)

anotherfishinthesea said...

Umm...
Unfortunately I share the whole crazy factor.

But what I really want to know is, what made you think of this topic!?

Miss Kriss said...

HAHA! This is hilarious! :) It's funny, though...all of my exes were short, had short dark hair and light eyes. Every single one of them. What's up with that? We never had the discussion about ice cream, but I would be willing to bet that every single one of them liked Strawberry too! Ahhh!!!

Well, lucky for me, DGC is tall, has light hair and dark eyes...and he doesn't like strawberry ice cream! (Not gonna lie, I just asked him what he thought about it... HA!)

Brown Girl said...

Oh I'm so confused. Do I like strawberry ice cream? Do I not like it? Am I supposed to? Ahhhh, thanks for making me reevaluate my life choices...kidding...kind of! ;)

Jane said...

Duly noted. No strawberry ice cream guys. But what if they like Neapolitan? Is a little strawberry okay :)

amy kelinda said...

HAHAHA. Best. Post. Ever.

I've dated my fair share of crazies, but unfortunately, I've never had a chance to get ice cream with them. I almost want to find them again just to ask if they like strawberry ice cream!

The Blonde Duck said...

Popped in from Pretty's to say hi!

FashionAddict said...

LOL, this is making me channel my inner ice cream freak. Hmmmm....I think there needs to be an important distinction between strawberry FLAVORED ice cream (i.e. a Wendy's frostee or the ice creams with the gel like faux strawberry crap that's not fooling anyone) and ice cream with real strawberry chunks within the ice cream. The former is not cool, the latter can be okay from time to time (although REALLY, who chooses strawberry over chocolate fudgey creations anyways?)

Krystyn said...

Okay...this is funny. But, I wonder about this. What about vanilla ice cream with fresh strawberries?

Of course, this is my choice...not hubby's. He likes chocolate.

Stephanie @ Just Shoe Me said...

I'm going out with the hotel concierge this week. I will absolutely find a way to work this into conversation. No shame.

Sarah - La Jeune Marie said...

Strawberry ice cream is sick. Strawberries in your vanilla is YUM. That's all. :)

SGM said...

I think this may be one of the most important sociological theories EVER. I am also highly suspicious of people who say VANILLA is their favorite. Please.