Amanda comes to us today from Martinis or Diaper Genies? (That was a statement, not a question. Don't let the punctuation fool you). She sort of internet stalked me until I agreed to let her do a guest post. Awkward, I know. Anyway, go over and check her out sometime. If you don't think she's funny, at least go over there and check out my guest post (oh yeah...I didn't mention we swapped blogs for the day, well we did...deal with it). Take it away Amanda (with my comments in bold)...
My name is Amanda. I'm visiting from waaaay on the other side of the internet. You know, the place where the goth kids hang out after school and where Britney was hiding out for a good 3 months. But it's fun over there, we mostly discuss what life is like for a married, almost 30 something, and if it's really time to have a baby or just have another drink. Right now I'm about halfway through my 3rd pinot and about to shoot my birth control with it. So you get a feel for where life is right about now.
So Sarah with her "more exciting life" got me thinking. If I had to cook up a life more exciting for myself...what would that really entail? I mean last night I almost shit myself when I saw the Halloween issue of Martha Stewart on newsstands (have you guys seen the issue with her and her horse?? that is MARTHA on the cover. freaky), so that probably wouldn't be chalked up to a most exciting life style to many. **however if anyone wants to get into a Halloween debate regarding importance, relevance and excitement, you know where to find me
Current excitements include:
- J. Crew sending me a discount via email that would make the 188 dollar blazer I am interested in 160 and then back to 188 with shipping. HISSSS. Ok not excited, mad actually. (Yeah. This one sucks. JCrew is being lame lately)
- Performing my morning, lookatmystomach ritual and seeing slightly less roly poly and slightly more hotsy tatsy. We're talking centimeters that could excite me here...
- B (the husband) purchasing the XL bottle of wine before coming home from work
- A full DVR waiting for me with new and amazing episodes of Gossip Girl, The Bchelorette, Rachel Zoe or Project Runway. Basically any show either A) meant for a tween or B) "Reality" TV (Reality TV is my FAVORITE)
- Anything involving carbohydrates
Now should I create a life more exciting, I believe the following things would excite me:
- Saks calling me to ask me to just please take all of these Louboutins off their hands. I mean they are begging. (she would be obligated to give some to me too, since obvi Saks heard about her through this blog. duh)
- A lifetime supply of pizza that isn't really pizza but your mouth thinks it is...like ghost pizza or something. What? It could totally be a thing.
- A clone of me to carry and birth my future spawn and then lose all of the weight on her own time. I'm busy with my shoes. (one for me too please. thanks.)
- B purchasing the XL bottle of wine before coming home from work. (That's huge and probably won't change)
So those things are reasonable I believe. You should always have dreams and aim high. But for now I'll be content with my US Weekly and some nachos (nachos are the greatest food ever invented. no discussion.). But if you see a girl on the street praying to the pizza ghost for a life more exciting...say hello. We could use some people like you on our side of the internet.