Thursday, December 3, 2009

I'm Tardy for the Party.

Hey, it happens.

The good news is: I made it back from the Midwest in one piece.

The bad news is: my luggage did not and I am really tired and cranky and can't focus on getting anything done.


So, since everyone else has already talked about their Thanksgiving, I figure it's my turn to one up all of you.

Let's start with a full recap, shall we? We shall.

Tuesday night: Had trouble focusing on packing. May have had a melt down or 3. Struggled with packing while watching the Biggest Loser because I couldn't focus on either one. Get picked up by S and realize I forgot contacts. Have to go back to my house at nearly 11PM to get contacts while S downs NyQuil.

Wednesday: Wake up ass-early for the airport. Took 8 years to check our luggage. No security line. Get to St. Louis (Southworst tore my luggage) and rent a car (we are a pretty big deal, so we got upgraded to a Dodge Nitro...don't be jealous*). Checked into our Thanksgiving hotel that we always stay at. Got warm cookies (they saw our Nitro and realized we were VIPs**). Picked up some booze. Acted as a shuttle to take S's cousins to his brother's house. Drank booze.

It looks like an armored car, no?

(Sidenote: OMG. Don't you feel like you are there with us?)

Thursday: Wake up. Go to the gym in the hotel for 15 minutes. Get annoyed with some girl who wants to be all chatty on the treadmill (Dear treadmill chick, we aren't friends. Hugs, sarah). Eat one turkey lunch. Play Seinfeld Scene It? as a gesture in family bonding. Go to S's aunt's house. Drink booze. Eat some dip and then eat some turkey. Missed the Real Housewives of Orange County. Got to watch A&M play a game against Texas. Played Catch Phrase (the girls dominated the boys)...

...this is where it gets really good...

...Lord only knows what we are talking about and S announces to his family that I blog. He gives them the name of my blog. My future sister-in-law tries to Google it, but can't remember the name and I won't tell her (she told me she was a Master Googler and could find ANYTHING...I wanted her to earn her title). So then she goes in the other room and asks S and he tells her and she finds it.

(Sidenote: Hi future in-laws! Thanks for hosting Thanksgiving! So great to see you all!)

The good news is that my future mother and father-in-law only have dial-up internet and really don't ever get on the computer (I have never seen their computer but S insists they have one and an internet connection). And the people who heard S's blog announcement are the cousins (and his brothers) and I don't have to censor my content for them. Plus, I have never talked about them before so I didn't even have to go back and delete any old content. EVERYONE WINS!

Friday: Winery day. I gear up for this day all year. This year we went somewhere new. None of us can handle change very well, so I am pretty sure we are going back to the old place next year.

This fancy lady is not me. This picture was on the winery website. I have no idea why.

Saturday: Shopping. Got my birthday gift early (thanks, S!). Dinner party that night.

Sunday: Get home from the party at 1AM. Fire alarm goes off at 1:45 or 2. Jerks are lucky I wasn't asleep or HEADS WOULD HAVE ROLLED. Stand outside in the cold. Watch 6 firetrucks show up. Gawk at the hoosiers in the wedding party who pulled the fire alarm and try not to kill them with my stink eye. Wake up late because I was UP LATE BECAUSE OF THE FIRE ALARM. Let the desk know that because of this interruption, we will not be checking out on time. Back to Houston.

I think we all remember this.

Overall, the trip was a success. We had a great time. Met a cousin's new girlfriend. Drank a lot and stayed up way too late. This was the first Thanksgiving that I have gone to the StL and it didn't snow (that maybe gave me the sads).

I am the most excited about the fact that we FLEW this year as opposed to last year's ROAD TRIP FROM HELL. Actually, the drive up wasn't terrible, it was the trip home that made me want to die. I am pretty sure it wasn't any better for S who drove THE WHOLE 15 HOURS (that's a one-way trip...that he drove both ways) BY HIMSELF because he is a rockstar and I am a whiner and a terrible driver (I had the super important task of DJ).

Doesn't the dog look thrilled to be on our road trip last year?

*This is monumental because after the whole HHR debacle, S swore I would never be allowed to choose our rental again. And when the guy offered us the Nitro I said yes before S had a chance to decline.

**The Doubletree gives free warm cookies to everyone. One of the main reasons I insist we stay there every T-giving. S insists on it because it's "convenient."


Martinis or Diaper Genies? said...

You're really not going to tell us what S gave you? Lame.

To Sarah's new family:
Hi! Good luck to you. Concerned about her gene pool mingling with yours? I'd be.

KISSES (better than hugs)

Summer (BisforBrown) said...

ok. um. yeah, i am with MoDG, k? present info please.

also, this cracked me up. seriously.

ps - are you sure the dog is real? maybe drugged?


carrie1 said...

I can't post anything... because I am still laughing at MODG's comment!

Cee said...

Sounds like a blast...that Dodge Nitro scares me.

I am pretty sure Real Housewives of Orange County wasn't new on Thanksgiving? Or was you have be worried.

Southern Champagne Wishes said...

Hahahaha! That Nitro is so VIP! Hilarious. I hate getting blog-outed - no fun!

Cee said...

good news...I just went and checked and it was not new. My heart was pounding for a minute or two in pure fear of missing it.

I guess I wasn't thinking that they show it 100s of other times.

Mrs. Bear said...

You are hilarious.. that Nitro looks scary.

what the heck did you get for your birthday?!

Ams said...

I don't want anyone to EVER know about my blog... especially family, post and future in laws - no thanks.

I totally felt like I was right there on the trip with you.

Smack S for me... don't EVER tell family about blog. EVER.

Kassie said...

Sucky travel story!! But HI to the new in-laws! How funny. I still haven't told many people about my blog...don't know how I'd feel about it being all out there. :)

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

Ohh, scary!! The in-laws are lurking about! I love Doubletree. Big spenders, no?

anotherfishinthesea said...

I want to hear your bday gift too!!
Ha and I enjoyed your hilarious holiday update.
AND I recently had a similar blog reveal experience when J told my coworkers that we ran into at a bar about a bracelet I won in a contest and then revealed I blog. He was proud. I was horrified. Um. Crap.

brit @ landlocked bride said...

Quite the adventure. It was supposed to snow yesterday here, didn't. Sad trombone.

ZDub said...

LMAO. I drive a Nitro and it's black. It has four wheel drive because of all the goddamn snow here.

It will be paid off in two years and I kinda hope it burst into flames so I can get a new car.

Also, being outed that you have a blog is RUDE. Some people did that to me at work, not cool.

I want to hear all about your gift as well, unless it was anal beads. And by unless, I mean especially.

Kristin said...

Riveting lady! And don't be tardy for the pardy. Whoooooooooooaaaaaaaa. Guess family shizit talking is now a thing of the past??

Courtney said...

My hubby doesn't even know I blog so that the in-laws won't be able to see what I write about them-well really just my MIL.